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I've been away from my apartment since 5 AM yesterday morning; I had a donor in the Bronx on my on-call shift yesterday morning, and then went straight to Alex's apartment afterwards to head up north for our sleep over. I had a great time last night. Also, I realized I am a champion Pictionary player, and that my stomach is a bottomless pit. I just got home less than an hour ago and my fucking toilet is still sitting in my fucking kitchen. I almost started crying. I filed a complaint with useless 311, and left an irate message on my landlord's voicemail telling him I want to be compensated for the incredible inconvenience of not only not having a toilet, but for having all the contents of my bathroom all over my apartment, having the floors dirty from the workers and having the bathroom filthy from all the renovations...all of which I'm stuck with cleaning up whenever the fuck they finish. He called back and told me they'd fix it tomorrow morning and he would compensate me. I just have to let him know how much I want to be compensated. I didn't expect him to actually go for that, so now I'm kind of stumped as to how much exactly I should ask next month's rent to be discounted. In the end I guess this actually works out better for me since I'm a bit strapped for cash. It's so nice out. I should go for a run in the park, but I'll probably just end up going to the gym later instead. I have to do something to make up for all I ate yesterday. Curses Emily! 04*27*06 My toilet is currently sitting in my kitchen. My landlord had it disconnected on Tuesday so they could rip up my bathroom floor to replace the floorboards. Apparently they replaced the floor today and had no where else to put my toilet while the floor dried. In the meantime I've been peeing in a cup I keep at my bedside. I accidentally drank my own urine last night thinking it was water. Just kidding! I've been using the toilet in an empty apartment upstairs. Had ya going for a second, didn't i? Isn't it weird when you've been singing the wrong lyrics to the same song for years, and then one day someone sings the right lyrics and you think, "Oh yeah, that does make more sense,"? 04*25*06 When I got my driver's license on my 17th birthday, I immediately flipped it over and checked off the box to be an organ donor. My mother was horrified; she snatched the card away from me and tried to rub the check off with her saliva. She told me that if I was ever in an accident, the paramedics would see that I wanted to be an organ donor and just let me die so they can harvest my organs. Thankfully I knew she was merely being crazy. After all, this isn't China. In reality, registering to be a donor does nothing; your family still has to consent to donation (in this country). No one would just let you die assuming your family will donate your organs afterwards. Actually, it's in the paramedics' and the doctors' best interest to do everything they can to keep you alive if they want all your organs. By that I mean if they revive you after your heart has stopped beating for a prolonged period of time, you're most likely going to be brain dead and the only thing keeping you alive will be a few expensive machines. A person can be pronounced legally dead even if their heart continues to beat due to life support measures. Only then can all your organs be used. Not to say your organs can't be used within a reasonable amount of time if you die the old-fashioned way, but a lot of organ transplants aren't as successful in those cases (this doesn't apply to corneas). Anyway, I had a brain dead donor today who had been in a car accident. The donor was relatively young. I was watching the organ team harvest the donor's organs from outside the operating room for a little bit before I went in. It was pretty amazing. When they sewed the chest closed, I went in and set up for my procedure, along with the skin and bone teams. They started taking off the drapes covering the body when all of a sudden the most horrible odor I've ever smelled dissipated throughout the entire room. I knew bodies continued to defecate after death, but today I actually witnessed it. I've smelled a John Doe corpse that had been rotting for over three months in the morgue that smelled better than what I smelled today. But I somehow got through it and got the hell out of there. But that smell haunted me all day. 04*24*06 So I ended up going to two shows at Irving Plaza this past weekend. The Nouvelle Vague show on Friday night was ok. I was surprised at the amount of French people in the crowd. But of course some drunk, loud idiotic Americans ended up standing behind Melissa and me for at least half the show. I hate when someone else ruins a show for me. Luckily some woman standing next to them told them they were being obnoxious and everyone around her agreed, so the drunk trio shut up finally. Aside from that, the band was a tad boring live. Last night Brook put me on the guest list to see Eagles of Death Metal since she's their publicist. I never even heard of them before, but I was game to hear something new...especially since it was free. I ended up not being that nuts about the band, but I met a lot of nice people and stood in the VIP area for the first time ever. Heath Ledger showed up and stood about five feet from me at one point. I was tempted to ask him to have gay sex with me, but decided against it. I don't want to be a home-wrecker. Saturday Brook and I still followed through with our plans even though it was shitty out. There was debate about whether to dress up and go out later that night; we finally decided to kick the dressing up idea to the curb and go out in our normal attire. Brook came over for a quick drink, and then we headed to uneventful Motor City. Even though I had around six drinks, I felt surprisingly sober and didn't even have a hangover the next day. I consider myself very lucky. This coming weekend should be fun. I'm going up north with Maria and Alex to visit our other school friend, Lynn, at her new apartment to have a sleep over. I haven't had a sleep over that consisted of more than one girl since I was in grade school. I can't wait to have pillow fights and fall asleep spooning each other in sexy lingerie. Actually, girls don't really do that...sorry guys. Otherwise I've been thinking lately how I'm completley clueless when it comes to dating. You'd think that after seven years doing the dating thing I'd have more insight into it all. Not to say that I don't have any, but I feel like a complete amateur. And it clearly doesn't get any better for a lot of people when you get older, as most of the older guys I've dated have demonstrated. Anyway, I just hope that my friggen therapist helps me out in this area once I'm through whining about my childhood. I'm paying her enough! 04*22*06 I dunno if I'm the last person to see this or what, but if you haven't already seen the cat on the fan video clip, for hilarity's sake, you must watch it now. 04*22*06 Fuck the rain. Ya hear me!? Fuck you! 04*20*06 My computer has been acting up lately. I think I'm going to have to take it to the Genius Bar. I don't even know if my warranty is still good. My poor baby. Sure wish I hadn't dropped it on the street when I was moving. I have tickets to see Nouvelle Vague with Melissa tomorrow night. They're a fun French band that does bossa nova covers of 80s punk/rock songs. Should be interesting to see them live. Saturday Brook and I have a whole day of fun planned. First we're having brunch, and then exploring the stores in the Lower East Side. In the afternoon we're getting waxed, and later in the evening we're dressing up and going out. I don't really care where we end up going as long as I get to wear the new dress I bought in L.A. Sunday I think I'll run around Prospect Park and then take care of some much-needed housework. I went to my allergist again yesterday and it looks like I'm allergic to dust just as much, if not more, as I am to cats. Unfortunately my apartment is filled with both. Just a random story I forgot to mention: last Saturday at three in the morning I woke up to the noise of someone trying to pull down the ladder on my fire escape. I stuck my head out of my window and asked two men what the hell they were doing. One replied that he was my neighbor and didn't have his keys. So I told him I'd buzz him in and promptly went back to bed once I had done so. I was awaken a minute later to knocking at my door. Same two guys again. My supposed neighbor didn't have the keys to his apartment door either and wanted to crawl through my window to get to his window. In the three months I've lived here I have somehow never seen the occupant of the apartment next to me, so I didn't know if he was telling the truth. He told me he'd show me I.D., but then realized he didn't have any. So he let me keep his wallet in exchange for letting him go through my window, and said he'd provide me with I.D. as soon as he got through. It seemed like a reasonable plan at the time, plus he was obviously gay so I wasn't worried about being raped. When he reappeared from inside the apartment next to me, he did not come bearing I.D., but holding his cat instead. Being the cat lover I am, I gave him back his wallet and pet the cat--no questions asked. Plus I just wanted to go to bed. But I obsessed about the whole incident for days, not really knowing if I let my real neighbor into his apartment. Finally last night he knocked on my door and apologized again for the whole fiasco. My mind is at ease about that, but my whole lack of caution in the situation is worrisome. It's like the time I thought someone broke into my apartment a few weeks ago (in reality the fire department had opened my window due to the building's CO detectors going off) and the first thing I did was run to the bathroom and throw back the shower curtain. What the hell was I planning on doing if there was someone there? Staring him down? Ugh. 04*16*06 I just got back from my date. I had a good time. I actually went on a date with the same guy once last summer already. So obviously I didn't do anything with my family for Easter. Easter shmeaster (I'm a little tipsy)! I had a lot of fun doing the photo shoot yesterday. Jesse Pearson and Richard Kern were so down to earth and really nice. My friend Maria from school also modeled for the shoot, as did two other girls I didn't know who are current students at John Jay College. I ended up wearing my own jeans and sneakers, but wore some semi-see-through top provided by them. Thankfully I had on a nice bra. I posed in the firing range with a rifle of some sort propped on my hip. I also fired off a round from a revolver before I left. The issue will be out in June; keep an eye out for it! I feel like I had/have a bunch of fun plans this past weekend and the following two weekends. It feels good to be busy. But what would feel even better is if I went to bed right now. 04*12*06 So today I had a donor and I was doing the standard penlight examination of the donor's eyes when I noticed something very strange. The iris in left eye looked so dark and the cornea was crystal clear, while the other eye's cornea was somewhat hazy and normal looking for an older person. I figured the donor must have had a cornea transplant in the left eye already, so I decided to take the whole eye instead for research, since we most likely couldn't have used the cornea for transplant. I called work just to make sure it was ok, and then began my procedure. When I opened up the eyelids of the left eye, the eye seemed to bulge out and start lifting up....and then it slid down the side of the donor's face. It was a fake eye. That's never happened to me before, or any other technician for that matter. I just find it interesting that their spouse for decades never thought to mention that when they were asked if the donor had any eye problems. Ah well. Also, I am a woman of my word; I think I have a date this Sunday. Otherwise I'm really excited about this photo shoot! 04*09*06 The editor of Vice Magazine finalized the photo shoot arrangements with me this weekend. He's no longer using Terry Richardson, but instead using Richard Kern, whom I've also never heard of. We're all going to drive to a shooting range that's north of the city on Saturday. Alex, Deirdre and Kristy said they'd all be interested in participating, but I still have to see if they're available that day. Once again I've had no hot water since yesterday. Lemme tell you, it's so fun not being able to shower. Friday night I saw Thank You For Smoking with Chris. I thought it was pretty hilarious. My favorite line from it was "I'm going to impale your mom on a spike and feed her dead body to my dog with syphilis." Brunch with Kristy and Deirdre was very pleasant. I got to see Kristy's new apartment on the upper east side afterwards and I'm green with envy; you could fit at least 4 of my studios in her place. The restaurant where I had dinner with Melissa and her family last night has a whole slew of Melissa's photographs hanging up (details here). I'm very proud of her. I got my hair highlighted afterwards and it's a little too blondish for my liking, but better than what I had before. As soon as I'm done with this, I plan to call Alex to figure out what we're going to do today. And finally, I uploaded and organized all my Los Angeles pictures, so here ya go:
04*07*06 So obviously I'm back from Los Angeles. The trip was okay. L.A. kind of feels like the suburbs to me though. I saw tall city-like buildings far off in the distance, but otherwise there were a lot of small houses and palm trees. I walked up and down Hollywood Boulevard, taking pictures of some stars on the Walk of Fame, and I briefly visited Mann's Chinese Theater where I looked at some riveting hand and feet impressions in the sidewalk. Rory and I also visited the Ripley's Believe It or Not! Museum and some awful wax museum in that area. Later we drove to a lookout point located on Mulholland Drive where we took pictures of each other with the Hollywood sign in the background. We also took a stroll down Rodeo Drive where I found not one store I could afford to shop at (big surprise), so we went to Melrose Avenue where I blew about $100. The day before I left we visited the Hollywood Forever Cemetery where I took pictures of the graves of Jayne Mansfield, Dee Dee Ramone, Charlie Chaplin and Mel Blanc, and then we drove to Venice Beach where we stayed only briefly due to inclement weather. When we weren't sight-seeing, we were either renting horror movies, going out to a horror movie or trying to scare each other. All in all it was a good trip, but, as usual, I found myself getting a little stir crazy upon leaving NYC. This place makes me stressed out and tired, but the second I step away from my fast-paced life I begin to miss it and get bored. I think my trip to France was the only vacation where I never got bored and felt Paris was up to par with NYC, if not better. In any case, I'm glad to be back and I find myself with quite a busy weekend ahead of me. Tonight I'm doing dinner and a movie followed by drinks with my friend Chris whom I haven't seen in a while. He told me that I may be able to hitch a ride with his band, The Memphis Morticians, some weekend next month to a show they're playing in Montreal. I've had an increasing desire to visit Canada lately, so that'd be exciting if it pans out. Tomorrow morning I'm having brunch with Kristy and Deirdre from the police lab whom I also haven't seen in a while. Later on I'm having dinner with Melissa and her family in Williamsburg, and then heading directly to my hairdresser to have her lighten the awful dark color my hair turned for some reason when I dyed it a few nights ago. Sunday I'm hanging out with Alex, who may also be joining me to do the photo shoot for Vice Magazine, whenever that may be. Otherwise I've decided to stop waiting on a certain person who can't make up their mind about something that seems relatively simple and straightforward to me. In fact, I think I may try dabbling in dating again. But not before I post my pictures from the trip sometime this weekend (hopefully).
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